Self-Consciousness
by tentitoo
Summary: Two months after Hiccup's victory over the Red Death he's still trying to cope with the loss of his leg. He feels self-conscious about it and is afraid it will make the people he loves go away but Astrid comes to the rescue and shows him that things aren't always bad. Hiccstrid one-shot.


**A/N: **Hello there guys :) this is my first HTTYD piece and I really hope you enjoy it! I've already watched both movies and are currently in the middle of the HTTYD series of Cartoon Network and I'm completely in love with this world (plus 20 year old Hiccup is such a hottie :3). Please excuse any grammar/spelling mistakes but English isn't my first language. Any constructive criticism is appreciated! (Rated T just to be safe!)

_Disclaimer:_ I own nothing obviously!

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**SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS**

_- One-Shot -_

Hiccup sat by the lake and sighed hugging his knees. Toothless laid behind him and nudged his side with his head.

"Sorry bud, not in the mood..." He told him setting his chin on the top of his knees.

He was happy to see Vikings and dragons living and working side by side, to be able to have Toothless living with him and his father and that he was able to save his people and all the dragons from the Red Death. Sure he was happy about all that but he couldn't help to feel self-conscious about his leg or rather his lack of leg.

It had been about two months since he had lost it in the battle. He didn't remember loosing it as he had passed out way before and maybe it was a good thing, Gobber didn't spare him any detail when telling him about his work on his leg. Apparently it was so badly burnt that he was forced to amputate it so he wouldn't die of infection.

Hiccup tried to take it in well, after all in Berk you need to have some battle scars or a missing limb to be considered a real man/woman. Even so there were days when the pain was unbearable and he found extra hard to adjust to some of his simplest daily activities and in those days he didn't care if the people of Berk now respected him and considered a real man. He just wanted the pain to stop.

It was one of those days and Hiccup felt like he could burst into tears any second. Toothless came closer and cuddled behind him setting his head next to his trainer's prosthesis and looked at him.

Hiccup petted the obsidian dragon's head and stretched his bad leg.

"Guess we're even eh Toothless?" He forced a smile, "Was it a payback for your tail, bud?"

The dragon showed him his trademark toothless smile. Hiccup knew better than to blame his best friend. He knew he wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for him but the pain was killing him!

Hiccup reached out to take out his prosthesis and felt a little better. His stump was still swollen and looked gross. Every time he looked at it Hiccup felt his stomach churn in disgust, Toothless on the other hand didn't seem at all affected by it and gained the awful habit of licking it whenever he could.

At first Hiccup freaked out thinking he could get sick from it but he soon found out that his saliva actually had healing properties that relieved his pain. He would only let him lick it when the pain was insufferable though.

Toothless raised his head as if asking for permission to lick it and Hiccup nodded curtly leaning against his dragon's belly breathing in slowly. He didn't feel like looking. Toothless's tongue tickled but it was efficient, Hiccup could feel the pain slowly decreasing.

"Thank you..." He told the dragon rubbing his belly and they stood there for a while just enjoying each other's company until they heard something ruffling through the tall grass.

"Hiccup, are you there?" It was Astrid's voice and it was closer than he expected it to be.

Hiccup's eyes widened and he sat straight, he needed to put his prosthesis back on.

"Oh for the love of Odin!" He muttered under his breath fumbling with the buckles that had somehow got stuck in each other. His shaky hands sure weren't helping.

"Hiccup?" Astrid called out again, even closer.

He started to freak out.

"Astrid, please don't come near me!" He replied his voice trembling as he tried to buckle his prosthesis and failed miserably thanks to his nervousness.

"Is everything ok?" She sounded alarmed. And just around the corner.

"Please Astrid! Please stay where you are! I don't want you to see me..." Hiccup cried out letting a frustrated grunt escape his lips as he failed to buckle his new leg again.

Toothless sensed his fear covered his leg with his tail right before the blond girl appeared behind one of the big rocks littered around.

"What happened Hiccup? Is everything ok?" Astrid asked worriedly.

"I asked you not to come near me..." He replied looking down to make sure Toothless was covering him from the waist down, "Please Astrid I'll meet you in a minute I just..."

"You just what Hiccup?" She asked stubbornly and crossed her arms in front of her chest, "I'm not leaving until you tell me what's wrong with you. You sounded distressed..."

"I didn't want you to see it..." Hiccup gave up knowing he would never be able to make her move.

"See what?" Her voice softened when she saw the look on his face and she started walking towards him, "What's wrong Hiccup?"

"I don't want you to see my stump, ok?" He shouted finally giving up to the tears that had been threatening to fall for a long time now, "It's swollen, gross, still hurts like hell and makes me want to vomit every time I look at it." Astrid opened her mouth to speak but closed it again and let him proceed, "The pain was awful and I had to take the prosthesis off but then I heard you call me and I freaked out because I didn't want you to see it but the stupid buckles got stuck..." His voice trailed off.

"Why don't you want me to see it?" She asked him calmly, her voice soft and maintaining a safe distance.

"I don't want you to see it and feel the same way I do... Disgusted..." Hiccup confessed.

"Why would I ever feel disgusted for looking at you?" Astrid wondered leaning in to cup his face in her hand clean the traces of tears from his face with her thumbs tenderly.

"B-because! It's really gross, I just..." Hiccup shook his head not finding the appropriate words.

"If you don't want me to see it, I'll respect your wish." Astrid told him looking him in the eyes and smiled shyly.

Hiccup nodded embarrassed. He trusted Astrid, but he didn't want to risk having her running away from him. He was pretty sure she had never seen a stump in her life only the prosthesis that he and Gobbler made. He wouldn't let her see it until it was fully recovered.

"Maybe some other time..." He finally said.

Astrid frowned for a split second but quickly erased it from her face, nodded in agreement and got up.

"Take your time." She replied with a smile as she disappeared through where she had come from.

Hiccup sighed relieved and was finally able to unstuck the buckles and put on his new leg. Toothless helped him up, the pain was almost gone and he was feeling a lot better than a couple of hours ago.

"I'm all done Astrid." He called after looking around and spotted her blond her by the entrance of their small hideout.

This was the place where he got to know Toothless and later found out that it was also the place where Astrid liked to run away to when she was having a bad day. It soon became their secret place, where they'd come to spend some time together or just run away from whatever was worrying them.

"Need a ride or do you have your own?" Hiccup inquired as he reached her.

"Actually I was thinking about walking back to the village. We should enjoy winter before devastating winter comes." The girl suggested, "Unless your leg still hurts..."

"I'll be fine." He assured, "Come along Toothless we're walking home."

The obsidian dragon batted his wings with excitement and strolled ahead of them, climbed the nearest tree and started jumping from tree to tree. They were silent for a while but the silence between them wasn't awkward at all, most of the time they spent together they usually kept quiet and just enjoyed each other's presence. As they walked side by side their hands kept brushing lightly against each other until Astrid decided she had waited enough and intertwined their finger together.

Hiccup smiled and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

"Just so you know Hiccup..." Astrid began breaking the silence, "I'd never find any part of you disgusting."

Hiccup bit his bottom lip feeling uneasy.

"Astrid... This is not like a scar, you know?" He told her.

"I'm aware of that. As I'm aware of the fact that I'll always like you no matter what." The blond insisted, "Thus not caring if you're one leg short."

"You may not care but I do. I was a failure as a Viking and my leg just turned me into an even bigger one, I'm twice the klutz I was."

Astrid punched his arm with all the strength she could muster.

"Ouch! What was that for Astrid?" Hiccup protested stopping on his tracked.

"For being so negative all the time!" Astrid spat, "You _always_ see the best in people how come you can never see the best in you?"

"Because!" He replied rolling his eyes with annoyance. This was the last thing he wished to be discussing right now.

"Wow Hiccup how enlightening..." She replied sarcastically.

Hiccup grunted and let go of her hand he was set in finding Toothless and fly away from there. He was having a hard time coping with the loss of his leg and Astrid was far from being the comprehensive (girl)friend he was in desperate need. Why couldn't she give him a break?

"Toothless! Come here bud!" He called out.

"Hiccup please wait!" She ran after him catching up with him easily, "I didn't mean to upset you..."

Toothless's head peeked through a few branches and waited for Hiccups new command but the boy asked him to wait a little longer.

"Well you did Astrid and I'm sick of you always pointing out my flaws."

"It wasn't criticism I was just pointing something out. It's a fact Hiccup, you always see the best in people and then you devalue yourself and your accomplishments. That makes me really sad... It makes me sad that you don't see what everybody else sees." She explained.

Hiccup looked down and fidgeted with the hem of his green undershirt. Astrid lifted his chin to force him look into her eyes.

"For Thor's sake! You defeated Red Death, you were the first Viking to ever fly a dragon and you managed to change your father's opinion about dragons thus ending a three hundred year old war! You might not be the big, muscular and strong standard Viking but you've accomplished things no other Viking would ever dream of." The blond told him.

"I'm aware of those things but-" Hiccup began but Astrid cut him off and grabbed his hands in hers.

"But nothing. I understand you're upset about your leg, who wouldn't be? But if you think about it all that leg is attached to all those great things you did and will always be." Astrid told him smiling and gave his hand a gentle squeeze.

"My problem is more self-consciousness than anything else." He admitted.

"I find it kind of sexy actually... And you'll never hear me say that again." Astrid's pale face reddened a bit.

"You do?" Hiccup couldn't but to feel his ego rise a little Astrid rarely blushed.

"I have told you before that you don't have to be bulk to be a good Viking you fish head."

Hiccup smiled a little.

"Thanks for making me feel better Astrid. You're a good... Hm... _Friend_."

Astrid raised her eyebrows and Hiccup braced himself for another punch but it never came. Instead he felt her kissing his cheek.

"My boyfriend is such an idiot..." She complained as she restarted walking back to the village.

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**A/N: **Well this is it! I'm not sure if I like this ending but here's the finish piece :) Hope you enjoy it and review please!


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